You may be familiar with the story of the vicar who was showing a small boy round his church. He was explaining all the different parts of the building including the memorials on the wall. And he pointed to one particular plaque and said to the little boy, “These are the names of all the people who died in the services.” And the little boy relied, “What, the morning services or evening ones?”
Before my faith came alive, all the associations that I had with church I have to say were bad ones. Church, for me, was not just a place you could expect to die of boredom during the services; it was an institution with more than its fair share of stuffy people and artificial behaviour.
Well, we are coming towards to the end of our little series on how we relate to each other. We’ll be thinking about family life next Sunday, but before we get there what about the church family? Are we boring, stuffy and artificial? (That’s a rhetorical question – you don’t have to answer).
Actually, is “family” even the right word to describe relationships in the local church? The word “family” is used 17 times in the New Testament and perhaps only once at most is it used to describe the church; it’s in Galatians 6.10 and it says this -
“Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.”
I think that means the church, but it doesn’t say so exactly. So some people might argue that the church isn’t really like a family at all. There are other metaphors in the Bible that certainly are used express what church is. For example, the church is compared to a healthy body, a holy temple, a beautiful bride, a royal priesthood, even a trained army. (And I have to admit I’ve met a few battle axes in my time in the church)!
But when we come into a relationship with God through Jesus the Bible often uses family language to describe what has happened to us. When we come to faith, God is no longer a remote and unfriendly being outside our experience. No, we experience him as our heavenly Father and Christians are called children of God.
And relationships between Christians are given family-like words too. Paul called Timothy his son in the faith.
And in Romans 16, when Paul is saying “hello” to a list of acquaintances before signing off, he says “Greet Rufus, chosen in the Lord, and his mother, who has been a mother to me, too.”
God does not want us to be on formal terms, addressing one another as Rev. Lambert or Doctor Taylor or Mrs. Palmer-Jones - but as brothers and sisters.
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to honour father and mother, she asked, “Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?” Without hesitation one little boy answered, “Oh, yes. Thou shalt not kill!”
But nevertheless, in 1 John 4.19, we are given the vision of church being family. God is our Father; therefore (like it or not) that makes us spiritual siblings.
This is how John puts it in that verse: “We love because God first loved us. If we say we love God yet hate a brother or sister, we are liars. For any of us who do not love a brother or sister whom we have seen, cannot love God whom we have not seen. And he has given us this command: Those who love God must also love one another.”
It is a wonderful thing that when we come to Christ, we are born into a family of brothers and sisters. The church throughout the world is my family. It’s an amazing thing, you know, you can travel to any part of the world and there you will find believers in Jesus Christ and you have this filial relationship with them as soon as you meet them.
Even in Wales! I was in Wales on holiday in July and went to the local Baptist church near to where we were staying. Kathie and I immediately felt completely at home. We sing the same worship songs, we read the same scriptures, we love the same God. These people understand me. I remember thinking “I don’t know a soul here but this is my family.”
They say you can choose your friends but you cannot choose your family. Take a look around you this morning. These are your brothers and your sisters!
If you’re not a Christian yet, they are your potential brothers and sisters! I don’t know whether that encourages you to become one or not! I’m sure it does… But we are one big family and the language we speak is love.
Now of course, brothers and sisters sometimes fall out. Most of my childhood was spent persecuting, and being persecuted by, my sister (who was bossy because she was the oldest) and my brother (who got away with murder because he was the youngest). We would watch Tom and Jerry together and totally relate to the violence they meted out on each other.
Christians fall out too sometimes because they are brothers and sisters. Gill Clayton once told the story of a vicar who was grumbling about his congregation. “The only thing that’s harmonious in this church” he said, “is the organ!”
Thank God that I never have to say that here. But we do need to be vigilant. The Bible says that we need to work hard at maintaining the unity of the spirit.
In the world, we talk of big families, small families, dysfunctional families, happy families, single-parent families, extended families, weird families, together families, rich families, poor families and so on. So what should the family of God be like?
Our reading from James suggests that it should be a community that believes and a community that acts. And James paints a vivid picture of what that might look like. Let’s look at James 2.14-18 again:
What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if people claim to have faith but have no deeds? Can such faith save them? Suppose a brother or sister is without clothes and daily food. If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it?
The preacher and sociologist Tony Campolo tells of the time he was walking down a street when his eyes were met by a tramp looking on from a bench. Dirty old overcoat, long matted beard with bits of food stuck in it, he was covered in grime from head to toe, and drinking from a paper cup... The guy called out, “Hey mister, you want some of my coffee?” “That’s kind of you but...”
Then he thought that’s wrong. So he said, “O.K., I’ll take a sip.” So he drank some of the coffee. Then he said to the tramp, “You’re getting pretty generous giving away your coffee. What’s got in to you?” The man said, “Well, the coffee was especially delicious today. And I think that when God gives you something good, you ought to share it around.”
Campolo thought to himself, “Here I am - a preacher - and this tramp has expressed what Christian love is about more eloquently than 1,000 of my sermons.” So he said, “Well, is there anything I can give you?” He thought the guy was going to ask for £10. The man said, “Yeah. You can give me a hug.” When he said that, Tony Campolo was thinking, “Oh great, why didn’t he just ask me for £10...”
But they put their arms around each other. Then this smartly dressed academic realised that this tramp was not going to let him go. He just held on to him for what seemed like forever. And people were passing in the street, staring at this sight.
And then Tony Campolo said this; “My embarrassment, little by little, turned to reverence and awe. Because I realised that this was not a tramp I was holding in my arms. I heard a voice saying ‘I was hungry, did you feed me? I was naked, did you clothe me? I was sick, did you care for me? I was the tramp you met on Chesterton Street, did you hug me?’ I had Jesus in my arms,” he said.
That’s what God’s family can look like. I think it’s one of the most beautiful things on earth.
We’ll talk about our blood families next week but before we do, and as I close, what about Jesus’ words in our Gospel reading?
While Jesus was still talking to the crowd, his mother and brothers stood outside, wanting to speak to him. Someone told him, “Your mother and brothers are standing outside, wanting to speak to you.” He replied to him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” Pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”
Michael Green, in his commentary, is really helpful, so I'll leave the last word to him.
One of the most painful things in Jesus’ life was that members of his family misunderstood him and even opposed him. John’s gospel reveals that his brothers did not believe in him. Mark’s gospel says that they thought he was mad. We know that that changed after the resurrection and his mother and brothers were amongst those in the upper room at Pentecost.
The incident in our Gospel reading tellingly finds Jesus’ family ‘outside’ while Jesus is ‘inside’. They weren’t interested in Jesus’ agenda. They wanted him to follow them – and that’s the wrong way round. So Jesus used the situation to teach about who his real family is. The truth is this; it is possible to be physically related to the Messiah and still not be part of the kingdom of God.
Every one of us needs to acknowledge who Jesus is and make a settled decision to follow him as Lord and Saviour. That alone is what brings people into a relationship with Christ that is closer than that of a mother or a brother.
Sermon preached at Saint Mary's Long Newton, 13th November 2011.
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