Introduction
As we run through some of our key values here at King’s, starting with God’s Word, the Bible, last Sunday, this morning we turn to prayer.
I’ve got about half an hour. The thing is, where do you start?
First, what is prayer?” It takes many forms. There’s praise, there’s confession, there’s requests, there’s lament, there’s agonising, there’s questioning; “Why, God?”
Then there’s the question “how to pray? Out loud or silently? On your own or with others? How do I stop my mind wandering off? When is the best time? For how long? With or without fasting?
Then, the theological issues. What is the point of prayer if God knows the future already? What about unanswered prayer?
Actually, it’s good that God sometimes delays in answering our prayers. John Ortberg, who leads a church in Silicon Valley, talks about his Uncle Otis who is on the prayer ministry team at his church and once ministered to a man suffering with severe constipation.
So Uncle Otis, moved with compassion, prayed, “Lord, heal this man immediately!” Everyone in the immediate vicinity was relieved that particular prayer went unanswered!
New York pastor Tim Keller says, “God will either give us what we ask for, or give us what we would have asked for if we knew everything he knows.”
There are roughly 650 different prayers recorded in the Bible. In addition, there are about 550 verses mentioning the word “prayer.”
Going to the Bible to find out what it says about prayer is like trying to get a glass of water from the Niagara Falls.
Without any exaggeration, we could put together a series on prayer lasting the whole year. And we still wouldn’t cover everything.
90% of Christians interviewed a few years ago said they find prayer difficult or challenging (and I’m tempted to say that the other 10% have been known to lie).
I’m one of the 90%. I have been woken up with drool running from the corner of my mouth having fallen asleep whilst praying in every conceivable bodily posture.
This explains why I pray most productively when I’m out walking. I can’t fall asleep then! I also find it much easier - and being an extrovert more enjoyable - praying in a group than on my own.
That’s me. You have to do what works best for you.
But I want to say this. A farmer will never enjoy a harvest unless he first ploughs the soil, sows seeds and waters the earth.
And likewise, you’ll never see God move significantly in your life without investing prayer into the things you care about. You just won’t.
Prayer is usually the decisive difference between what we want God to do and what God actually does.
So however hard we find prayer, and practically all of us do find it tricky at times, we’ve got to find a way to make progress.
I’ll say a bit at the end about how we want to make prayer an actual foundational building block at King’s, and not just a vague aspiration.
But first, I want to look at what God’s word says and I felt I should zoom in on just one two verses from the Old Testament tucked away, like a needle in a haystack, in the middle of a long list of names.
The Prayer of Jabez
In the year 2000, Bruce Wilkinson of Walk Through the Bible Ministries wrote a short book, just 80-pages, but it became a global phenomenon, selling well-over 10 million copies. It is in the top 5 best-selling Christian books ever written.
The book was about the prayer of one obscure Old Testament character. And that book is called The Prayer of Jabez.
“What a pain!” Have you ever said that about someone? Has anyone ever said that about you? It was said about this man, Jabez. It’s actually what his name means: ‘one who has brought me pain’.
When Jabez was born the delivery was unbearably painful and his mother never let her son forget it. When she named him, she wanted him - and everyone else - to know that bringing him into the world traumatised her.
Most children are born after painful and exhausting labour and most mothers suffer in the process. But how many mums do you know who take it out on their kids by giving them names like Distress, Soreness and Agony?
I think we would say today that Jabez came from a dysfunctional family, with a complaining and controlling mother, whose inability to move on loaded her son with guilt.
But in spite of this unpromising start in life, Jabez overcame the setbacks of his birth and upbringing. The Bible says that he was honourable - more honourable than the rest of his family.
This is what 1 Chronicles 4.9-10 says:
Jabez was more honourable than his brothers. His mother had named him Jabez, saying, “I gave birth to him in pain.” Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, “Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain.” And God granted his request.
The key to the way out from this man’s unhappy, almost cursed, childhood is his prayer.
There’s a church leader based in Bournemouth called Tim Matthews and he sometimes talks about his big but. Do you have a big but? I hope you do!
Tim Matthews is not talking about the measurements of his posterior, you’ll be glad to hear; it’s actually a comment on Psalm 109.4 which says this:
“With words of hatred they surround me; they attack me without cause. In return for my friendship they accuse me, BUT (here’s the big but) BUT I am a man of prayer.
This is written by David before he was king. He’s on the run, with an insanely jealous and controlling king called Saul tracking him down. There are hundreds of armed men intent on killing him. He’s having to flee for his life and take refuge in desert caves.
God has allowed all of that. David never disputes the fact. BUT, he says, I am a man of prayer.”
However bleak your circumstances are, (health, finances, work, family, whatever it is) your prayer adds a huge and decisive “but” to the outlook.”
The Bible says, “Jabez cried out to the God of Israel.” It was not his mother’s crying out in pain that would define his life. It was his crying out to God. This proved to be the turning point in his life.
Jabez had a big but. “Yes, I was born in pain. Yes, my mother put a millstone round my neck. Yes, I’ve lived under a curse my whole life – BUT I’m going to turn to God and cry out to him to act in such a way that my past shall no longer determine my present or my future.”
Jabez asks for God’s blessing on his life.
He believes that God is a good, good Father who - as Jesus said - delights to give good gifts to his children when they ask.
In James 4.2 God calls a spade a spade when he says, “You do not have because you do not ask.” That’s it, that’s why. So Jabez asks.
He knows that the Lord said to his ancestor Abraham, “I will bless you; I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing.”
He also knows about Abraham’s grandson Jacob who wrestled with the angel of the Lord all night long and said, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.”
Jabez asks for blessing so he can in turn bless others.
Our purpose as God’s people, the church, is to be a portal of blessing to the world – but you and I have no blessing to offer anyone if we ourselves have not been blessed first.
Hear the passion, the desperation, in Jabez’ prayer; “Oh, that you would bless me!” Are you ready to do battle in prayer, and just refuse to give up until blessing comes?
Ask God. Go on, ask! Pray for favour, the measure of which spills over to bring blessing to your family and church and community.
Jabez also asks God to enlarge his territory. He has his eyes on growth. He wants his life of faith to have greater reach. Why don’t you?
Jabez could have accepted his lot and resigned himself to a life of emotional want, and lack of love and constantly unmet needs.
Have you ever asked God for something so big that you could not possibly achieve it by yourself, it would have to be God?
Ask God to increase his sphere of grace around your life. Ask him to extend your territory.
Ephesians 3.20 says that God is “able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us.”
Then Jabez asks for God’s hand to be with him. The hand of the Lord, in the Bible, means his power.
It says in Joshua 4 that God dried up the Red Sea “so that all the peoples of the earth may know that the hand of the Lord is powerful and so that you might always fear the Lord your God.”
It says in Acts 11 that “the hand of the Lord was with [the Christians as they took the gospel into new territory] and a great number believed and turned to the Lord.”
Ask God today that his hand will be on your life, on your church, so that the world will witness something so remarkable that when it comes to pass, everyone will have no option than to say, “that could only have been the hand of God.”
I read a testimony in Premier Christianity magazine a few years ago that encouraged me to persevere in faith for things I started praying for a long time ago.
It was written by a man who couldn’t stop thinking about a girl called Esther.
But he didn’t know if she fancied him, and he was very nervous about asking her out. So he started to ask God for guidance…
This is what he says:
“While on my lunch break, I went for a sandwich and as I pulled some cash out to pay for it, I glanced at a £5 note. Written in pencil was the word ‘Esther’ (it was one of the old paper banknotes). What were the chances?
“I went into a shop, bought a small picture frame and put the banknote inside.” He decided to ask Esther out later that week and give her the framed banknote as a little gift if she said yes.
Esther told him she’d love to be his girlfriend. So he said, “I have a present for you.” And he gave her the little box wrapped in pretty paper.
She tore off the paper, opened the box, held up the frame and went very quiet. She just stared at it.
There was an awkward silence so he told her how he had come across it. Finally, she looked at him – but not smiling. She seemed confused, a bit disturbed even. It definitely wasn’t the reaction he was hoping for.
And she slipped the framed £5 note into her handbag. She seemed so out of sorts that he was reluctant to press her about it.
Anyway, two years later, they got married and were moving into a new flat together. While unpacking, he came across that framed £5 note.
“Esther,” he said. “You never told me about why you acted so strangely when I gave it to you.”
This time, as she took the frame in her hands, she smiled. “If I had told you the story behind it then” she said, “I think you would have felt too pressured. A few years before we met, I was working as a cashier at a printing shop.
And I started thinking one day, how do you know when you’ve met the love of your life? I got this idea. I wrote my name on a £5 note and gave it out when I had to give change.
And I said a prayer as I wrote my name that somehow that banknote would end up with the man I would go on to marry.”
That’s the hand of God right there…
The final part of Jabez’ prayer is that God will keep him from harm so that he will be free from pain.
Causing pain and being labelled a pain creates a cycle that repeats itself through generations because hurt people hurt people.
The prayer of Jabez is a simple request that God will break that destructive pattern of pain so there is a better legacy to pass on.
Some of you know about kintsugi. It is the art of repairing broken ceramics with gold or silver lacquer.
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| Photo by Pomax on flickr |
It comes from the Japanese Kin (meaning gold) and Tsugi (meaning join), so it literally means: joined with gold.
Kintsugi takes cracked pottery and makes something lovely from it. The Bible says that God gives a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.
God never promises anyone a life with no pain, and no heartbreak.
But he wants to turn all that is shattered and crushed in us into something beautiful. And one of the ways he starts to do that is when we bring our brokenness to him in prayer like Jabez did.
And the Bible says, very simply, “And God granted his request.”
God’s word says you are not an orphan; you are adopted by grace. You are not defined by your past; you are a new creation. You are not a miserable sinner; you are a mended saint.
Your past does not dictate your future, provided you live in the identity God has given you.
Prayer changes things. And prayer changes people.
There was a Christian school teacher from Bristol whose colleague was an avowed atheist. One week, they both took a class on a coastal field trip, and at the end of the week this atheist teacher went out into the sea for a swim.
There was a rip tide which carried him out to sea and before long he was in serious trouble. He was too far out to be heard, so he started to wave back to those who were on shore.
At first, they thought he was just a friendly wave as if to say “come on in.”
Then someone realised he was panicking, so they managed to alert some lifeguards and they brought him safely back to shore.
Later, on the way home, the Christian teacher asked him, “What were you thinking about when you were all at sea and in grave danger of drowning?”
And his reply was, “I just kept repeating the Lord’s Prayer.” That man was no longer an atheist after that…
If each of us shared, one by one, all the prayers God has answered in our lives I’m sure it would take days to hear the end of it.
My observation, in decades of being a Christian, is that praying Christians tend to be positive Christians and praying churches tend to be prevailing churches.
Because when a church gets it together, and seeks God’s face, and prays heaven down, things start to happen; people come to Christ more frequently, people get filled with the Holy Spirit more regularly, remarkable miracles and ‘God incidences’ occur more often, ministries get raised up and the church moves forward.
I’ve seen this kind of virtuous circle time and again – the key is consistent, united, believing, prayer.
Ending
So I want to end, in the five minutes I have left, to outline how we’re going to make prayer a priority here at King’s this year and going forward.
I have to be honest with you, since coming here two and a half years ago, there have been a few exceptions, but I have only rarely experienced an electric atmosphere of passionate, believing prayer.
I want to see a faith-propelled, rising tide of passion for God to move in power at King’s. And I believe we will get there.
I heard only this week that half a dozen or so just decided to gather to pray together for an outpouring of the Spirit, for a move of God in our town and nation.
It wasn’t a top-down initiative that came from the elders or anything like that. It was organic and it came from hearts that are hungry to see God do more – I love that. I want to see more of it.
I love it when I see people spontaneously after the service here, praying with each other over coffee, as things come up in conversation.
I got a text this week about the group of women who meet each Monday to chat and pray. They also have a WhatsApp group if you can’t get there in person. They’ve seen lots of answers to prayer. Just this week for example, someone shared in that group that they had a skin irritation and was concerned that it would prevent them from sleeping. The group raised their voices to God in faith - and that person slept through.
There is an opportunity every Sunday morning before the service from 9.45am to 10.15am to drop in to the Cumberland Room and pray. It’s not the best time for everyone; especially if you’re involved in getting the service ready – but for others it’s a perfect time.
One of the main reasons we are prioritising midweek groups in homes is so that we can pray together; for one another, for the mission of the church, for the town and for the world.
And on the last week of every month the plan is that, instead of meeting in homes, we come together to hear from God and pray as a church.
The elders pray together every time they meet, and two or three times a year they’re going to spend a whole morning before God, inviting other leaders and prophetic people to join them, to seek the Lord and pray into what we sense is on his heart.
And I’m sure there’s a lot more going on than I am aware of. Be encouraged. Keep going. God is able.
And if it’s time for you to kick start your prayer life back into action, then let’s go.
Sermon preached at King's Church Darlington, 15 January 2023
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